Serious Gondogol Hoi !

By Manuwant Choudhary

I found a hassled pregnant Vidya Balan running around in a Kolkata yellow amby but in Nai Dilli so why I asked her `Bidyaaji what you doing here..again trying to find a lost husband'???....

Vidya: I dont want to look for my husband even if he is lost..and it is V...V....V....for Vellore....not B..for Bombay...

Me: But it is M for Bombay...

Vidya Madam: Are you a Shiv Sainik or a Bong?

Me: I am neither...

Vidya: Good good..then I can share with you my Dilli adventure...actually I am here to find out why India has stopped growing...that chief economic advisor to Finance minister Kaushik Basu..has told the IMF.

Me: I never thought anyone from St. Xavier's Mumbai could think about GDP!

Vidya: Aaah no, no...I am a different person after film `Kahani.."

Me: You mean you have become like Kali !

Vidya, no, not Kali..Durga...didn't you watch my film?

Me: Aah sorry..I don't have the money...I don't earn even Rs.28 per day.. But tell me did you get to meet Pranab Daa. India's finance minister and what did he tell you.

Vidya: I am amazed...he just said India is growing but when I asked him to explain he just started singing the Kahani song `Aami Shottee Bolchee....Shooteee...Shotteeee..Shotteeee....

Me: I know Mukesh bhai is growing his wife has opened a retail store even in Patna...But Kaushik Basu did not mean Ambani ...

Vidya: Yes, yes, I also met the Prime Minister and you know I found even the PM listening to the Kahani number...Aaamee Shottee Bolchee..Bolcheee. Bolcheee..Shotteee, Shatteee Shattee...

Me: But thats because he does not know the meaning of Shotteee..everytime Mamata threatens him she uses the word.

Vidya: Yes, he asked me whether Shottee means anything to bring down the government...and when I said no..he seemed relaxed...

Me: Who else you met?

Vidya: I also met Montek Singh Ahluwalia...nowadays he knows more about poverty than even the poor. But even he says just Shoteee, shotteee, shoteee...India is growing.

Me: But if India is growing why do the poor earn only Rs.28 per day?

Vidya: Montekji said it was Shotteee....

Me: Did you meet any CBI officers to find out?

Vidya: Yes, yes, CBI and IB....I tell you they are so bad arresting Kanimozhi....a growing India should not arrest anyone...but they all agreed that India was growing...

Me: Ya but they may be saying that about corruption...

Vidya: No, you can't link the two....if India grows the corrupt will also grow..its proof India is growing....

Me: Forget the rest....I just want to know what the Prime Minister said..

Vidya: Just Shoteee, Shotteee, Shotteee....and he kept looking at my tummy...

Me: Baby Boom !

Burma's April Fool Election

By Manuwant Choudhary

Is Burma only fooling the world by holding elections on April Fools Day...allowing Aung San Suu Kyi to contest elections...and win...as the only way to better their economic situation and isolation.

Its heartening ofcourse that Aung San Suu Kyi and her party have won.

But they won an election 20 years ago also.

But yet...it was a unique election as her results were being announced by international media even before the counting process had begun.

She is a hero.

And when you lock up a hero for 20 years, you lock up an entire nation.

This is exactly what Burma's Generals have done.

I am not sure what they have achieved really.

And it makes me smile when they visit Bodh Gaya to pray (for their sins)

It is also welcome that the international media is being allowed into Burma finally.

Yet, the reports I have seen are too few and superficial..mainly aimed at getting their own TRPs up...but it doesn't even scratch the surface to see the real condition of the people of Burma whom Aung San represents.

International media have also been doing stories about how Burma is the hot business destination and why not.

But as a friend observed about the country's current status.."Burma is a museum!"

So one wonders who will go into Burma for business?

Will it be just the exploiters looking for timber and oil and gases?

Will Burma only have newspapers that carry the General's photos?

I think bloggers and campaign activists have done more to champion the release of Aung San than mainstream media.

A few have done so at great risk to their own lives like swimming across the lake to meet an imprisoned Aung San.

Aung San herself is a beacon of hope but she also reminds the world that democracy does not equal freedom.

A lot of work needs to be done...the people must be freed so that they may be able to pull themselves out of poverty.

So far Aung San's economic views are less known and its not easy to say how she will lead a country by sitting in the opposition.

But indiavikalp wishes her luck.