Saturday, April 9, 2016

Bihar Prohibition (2) - Thou Shall Test Soap !


By Manuwant Choudhary

Nitish Kumar is so troubled..every time he goes to the bathroom he finds his soap missing. So he calls his chief secretary..(CS)

CM: yeh mera sabun gayab kyon ho jaaata hai...(why does my soap go missing everyday from the bathroom)

CS: Sir, its a problem everywhere sir.

CM: What do you mean?

CS: Everyone is eating soap these days.

CM: You mean to say I am also eating soap?

CS: No sir, how can I accuse you of such an illegal act..only people of Bihar commit illegal acts.

CM: Enough. I want a high level inquiry into the missing soap.

CS: Sir, a low-level inquiry is enough...rats have been eating your soap.

CM: Rats ! But there were no rats in the CM house when I returned as chief minister.

CS: Sir, that was because Jitan Ram Manjhi was chief minister before you.

CM: You mean Jitan Ram Manjhi ate up all the rats....

CS: Sir, I am such a junior officer to talk about food habits of chief ministers...but if you want to get rid of the rats again..you can try making Jitan Ram chief minister again...

CM: NEVER.

CS: Sir, but he is Mahadalit.

CM: Never. Don't mention his name again...besides I was asking you about soap not Manjhi...Now I prefer rats to Manjhi...

CS: yes sir rats are just like us... we are getting news that even people across Bihar are eating soap.

CM: But why?

CS: They get some kick.

CM: Is soap alcoholic?

CS: We don't know but they are made of chemicals surely.

CM: Call all of Bihar's scientists and I want all soap brands tested in our laboratory.

CS: Sir, Bihar does not have scientists...just castes !

CM: So get me the scientist caste?

CS: There are none...we are trying to figure out which caste Aryabhatta was?

CM: Do not waste my time...my senior officers are my scientists..they do everything I tell them to do...they drink when I tell them and stop drinking when I order so...so disciplined...my cops...

CS: But our labs are not equipped to test soaps.

CM: I am going to have them tested in my presence.

CS: But how?

CM: Surely, by eating it...

CS: My officers have been testing all day...Godrej, Pears..even MNC soap P & G....ahh camay tastes so good they say....and liril....the lemon flavour.....they say is beautiful like the girl who campaigns for it...

CM: Ban all MNC soap.

CS: Sir, we tested Baba Ramdev soap too...and our officers were so ecstatic..it has some Himalayan churn (herb) in it..now all our officers are saying Bharat Mata Ki Jai !

1 comment:

Jenny Simes said...

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